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PRODID:-//COVID ReHash House Harriers - ECPv5.11.0//NONSGML v1.0//EN
CALSCALE:GREGORIAN
METHOD:PUBLISH
X-WR-CALNAME:COVID ReHash House Harriers
X-ORIGINAL-URL:https://covidhhh.com
X-WR-CALDESC:Runs for COVID ReHash House Harriers
BEGIN:VTIMEZONE
TZID:Australia/Melbourne
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TZOFFSETFROM:+1100
TZOFFSETTO:+1000
TZNAME:AEST
DTSTART:20260404T160000
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DTSTART:20261003T160000
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BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=Australia/Melbourne:20260408T080000
DTEND;TZID=Australia/Melbourne:20260408T170000
DTSTAMP:20260715T152336
CREATED:20260407T234136Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20260407T234136Z
UID:5635-1775635200-1775667600@covidhhh.com
SUMMARY:#313 : BallBag's Ball Beating
DESCRIPTION:Our esteemed Patriarch actually managed to locate the correct destination\, on the right day\, and at the right time. Truly\, a miracle for the ages. In his usual professional coaching persona\, he put us through the expected drills; the only thing missing was a good planking. However\, judging by the way some of the boys were handled on the court\, they still left with enough bruises and sore spots to make a planking feel like a spa day. \nSpeaking of planking—and other physical exertions—news.com.au is reporting that men should be aiming for at least 21 “releases” a month to slash prostate cancer risk by 22%. Miscarriage made no bones about it\, promptly announcing his departure to go work on his “prostate health.” Godspeed\, you dedicated philanthropist. \nThe Awards Ceremony (or Lack Thereof)\nBaah Sinister took home Best Player of the Night. \nOur GM naturally secured Worst Player of the Night—consistency is key\, after all. \nYour humble scribe\, Eno\, nabbed Best Shots of the Night. Look\, just ask any happy woman on the Gold Coast; Eno always delivers the best shots when the sun goes down. \nDeep Thoughts and Deeper Balls\nThe core message from our coach tonight was simple: whatever we do\, the aim is to make our balls go deeper. This is a philosophy we apparently embraced last week too. We even took a five-minute pause under the gondola to reminisce about the “beautiful sights” from the previous run. Baah Sinister was so enamoured he suggested tracking down whoever made that booking to see if they were “cuming” again. Honestly\, the puns write themselves. \nThe Verdict\nThe night was ultimately salvaged by the spread provided by Ball Bag’s better half\, though it was tragically onion-free. When our GM wasn’t busy showing off his ballet skills with some Pepe Le Spew pirouettes\, he managed to bag a hat-trick. Not of goals\, mind you\, but of failing to organise a circle. That’s 3 for 3. At this rate\, he’s giving Albo a run for his money in the “useless leader” stakes. \nSpecial shout-outs to Tommy the Toucher—who showed up because there were no schoolkids around to bother during the holidays—and Arsenic\, who filled the role of quasi-assistant coach and designated ball carrier. \nNext Week\nThe Walking Dead are celebrating their 2\,500th run. If you’re planning on supporting them\, I’d suggest bringing a spare oxygen mask and perhaps some smelling salts. They might actually try to move faster than a tectonic plate for once. \nWe’ll see you there. \nOn On!
URL:https://covidhhh.com/run/313-ballbags-ball-beating/
LOCATION:Tom Rose Park (HQ)\, 69 Wandin Street\, Nerang\, QLD\, 4211\, Australia
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DTSTART;TZID=Australia/Melbourne:20260414T183000
DTEND;TZID=Australia/Melbourne:20260414T203000
DTSTAMP:20260715T152336
CREATED:20260610T005420Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20260610T005420Z
UID:5640-1776191400-1776198600@covidhhh.com
SUMMARY:#314 : No More Tennis Rally Run
DESCRIPTION:Well f&ck me\, it’s not often the walkers beat the runner’s home after a rendezvous in the middle of the bush….. \nNot sure if it was all the on backs\, the navigationally challenged front runners or the saboteuring walkers changing the trail markings but somehow WTFAI (yes\, his rash from his recent Asian “exploits” has cleared up) and Fresh Meat (walking because the Gourmet run the night before was so “hard”) cruised in to the on after 6.5km / 1hr 10min later wondering…..are the runners lost? \nOf course\, with our fearless leader (Pepe Le Spew) front running as usual the answer was simple\, yes\, the runners were lost!! I mean Pepe has only done 4\,512 runs in the forest so it’s really easy to miss the side passage back down to Tom Rose from the fire trail\, just ask Eno F$ck All & Y2KY Jelly. \nSure\, the walkers would say there was a big f$ck off check that the crew from Artemis II could have seen from the moon but hey when you’re a front running bastard you don’t sweat the small stuff like trail markings. \nIn the circle the well-marked trail was rewarded with a 6.9 from both the walkers and runners due partly to the shear amount of wildlife spotted on root\, which was expertly captured by our reserve Hash Flash\, followed by the usual spiteful and vindictive charges as we let loose celebrating our first circle under the new regime. \nIn a moving ceremony the impressive new Carlos Alcatraz Cup was presented to Baaah Sinister and the Voyeur award to Eno F$ck All for their efforts on and around the courts from the previous weeks. \nThe raffle was won by the hare (ArseNic) who was delighted with his “How to Play Poker” and the “Royal Tattoo” DVD’s. A fitting reward for all his efforts putting on another great night of hash and raising the question once again\, is the raffle rigged? \nNext week we do it all again as we remember those hash men who made the ultimate sacrifice as we pay homage to the ANZAC’s with a big hill\, two-up and the lighting of the fire. \nOn on\n🐏😈
URL:https://covidhhh.com/run/314-no-more-tennis-rally-run/
LOCATION:Tom Rose Park (HQ)\, 69 Wandin Street\, Nerang\, QLD\, 4211\, Australia
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BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=Australia/Melbourne:20260421T183000
DTEND;TZID=Australia/Melbourne:20260421T203000
DTSTAMP:20260715T152336
CREATED:20260610T005843Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20260610T005843Z
UID:5642-1776796200-1776803400@covidhhh.com
SUMMARY:#315 : Baah's ANZAC Bash
DESCRIPTION:It was a night for the history books\, though most of us are trying to drink enough to erase the memory of that first incline. We kicked off Run #315 with the solemn notes of the bugle and the traditional Rum and Milk\, a fitting start for Baah Sinister’s Anzac Day Memorial Run. Little did we know\, that was the last bit of “fitting” the night would offer before the Hare decided to reenact a forced march through the trenches. \nThe hill at the beginning was enough to kill the fittest soldier\, but the Hare wasn’t done; he proceeded to lead us onto a Black rated bike trail that was clearly not fit for human presence. The only redeeming quality of the entire ordeal was the Port at the first drink stop. After that climb\, most of us were struggling to breathe\, let alone swallow\, but we persevered like the heroes we are. \nOnce the walkers ambled off\, the runners proceeded into the abyss. Nothing overly eventful happened until we stumbled upon the walkers\, who had apparently got lost behind enemy lines and managed to land right in the middle of the runners’ trail. To make matters worse\, Eno proved to be a back-running bastard yet again\, intercepting the trail between the front and back-runners. Speaking of the front\, our esteemed GM\, Pepe le Spew (or rather\, le Caca)\, couldn’t maintain his position and offered up a cacophony of excuses for his lack of pace. \nThe real challenge was the descent. Whatever goes up must come down\, and we found ourselves back at the first drink stop to finish the stashed Port. Once the Penfolds bottle was dry\, we headed down the hill where The Fuck Am I truly deserved his name; he found out exactly where he was very quickly\, which was on the floor. Twice. The good news is that Claret was spilt\, and thankfully it wasn’t the quality goon-bag port we’d just finished. \nMenstral heard there were hungry fish at the bottom so he rushed down the hill in his feet gloves – and got a charge for his over achieving\nThe drama continued when we discovered our base had been “attacked\,” forcing a retreat to HQ\, only to find the gates locked. After watching Arsenic take approximately 30 turns to maneuver his vehicle while Eno’s tiny car blocked the entire world\, we finally landed at Rotaract Park. We refuelled on an Irish stew prepared by Baah Sinister who thoughtfully brought toilet paper for Fresh Meat’s ride home. the usual charges were laid\, and the circle was closed. \nOnOn!
URL:https://covidhhh.com/run/315-baahs-anzac-bash/
LOCATION:Tom Rose Park (HQ)\, 69 Wandin Street\, Nerang\, QLD\, 4211\, Australia
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BEGIN:VEVENT
DTSTART;TZID=Australia/Melbourne:20260428T183000
DTEND;TZID=Australia/Melbourne:20260428T203000
DTSTAMP:20260715T152336
CREATED:20260610T010512Z
LAST-MODIFIED:20260610T010512Z
UID:5647-1777401000-1777408200@covidhhh.com
SUMMARY:#316 : Before ewe F&ck off Run
DESCRIPTION:Drink Start\, Drink Stop\, Drink Finish. \nEwe can imagine the shock and bewilderment of the assembled hash men when the hare explained there was in fact a trail and worse still\, we were expected to run it!! \nA night on his big deck (try saying that with a kiwi accent) thwarted the runners headed in the general direction of Highland Park Tavern only to be disappointed to find an arrow pointing up. \nAnd up\, and up and up we went so much so it was clear the hare had used his car to set the trail. To be fair it probably didn’t help that returning runner\, Derro Licked my Balls\, and Fresh Cum Balls decided to ignore all the clearly marked on backs adding an extra 6.9km to the run and a detour via Spoofs front yard. \nWe refrained from popping in for a cup of tea learning from an earlier issue with a cubby house that Derro Licked my Balls had taken a liking to. It turns out a kennel of hash men wearing black skull t-shirts and shining torches into people’s property is a bit of a red flag to the Highland Park neighbourhood watch who ended up chasing us down the street screaming…..go back to Beenleigh!!!! \nAfter a shiggy sojourn the smell of peanut butter overcame the pack meaning only one thing…….the Sheep Dog piss stop was near. Sure enough\, doing his best impression of a homeless man on a park bench\, was the hare (WTFAI) with his hip flask of the good shit and home brewed Cerveza beer. \nUnfortunately\, we arrived too late for a drink with Ballbag’s……or so we thought. Despite clear instructions from the hare\, a well-marked on home trail and a 30-minute head start somehow this young pup managed to make it back to where he started just in time for another Sheep Dog shot……. absolute hash genius!!!! \nBack in the circle the hare paid the price for setting a 6.9km (excluding on backs) / 1hr 16min run despite clearly advertising an evening of drinking on his big deck however the Sheep Dog fuelled walker scored it a 10. \nThe usual spiteful and vindicktive charges followed with the raffle won by ……everyone (yes\, Mrs Fresh Cum Balls wants her shed back)\, but not before Derro Licked my Balls was reunited with the now orphaned offspring of Bubbles who somehow survived the unfortunateness at the AGPU. \nWell done to the hare (WTFAI) for setting a great run/walk\, quality piss stop and 3 course banquet. Next week Derro Licked my Balls will be guiding us around some virgin bush from a mystery location on the coast as we celebrate the “May Day\, May Day” run.
URL:https://covidhhh.com/run/316-before-ewe-fck-off-run/
LOCATION:WTFAI’s Dick (Deck)
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