#308: Eno’s Lazy Hash C*nt in the Bush

Last night’s shenanigans on the Covid ReHash were exactly what you would expect from this motley crew.

The lazy Hare put on a stellar digital run after narrowly escaping being completely entwined in a massive spider’s web and nest. Thankfully all he lost was the bag of flour intended to mark the trail; a small price to pay to avoid becoming a midnight snack for an eight-legged freak. The turnout was great and everyone had a solid time out there in the dark.
To top it all off he somehow threw on a Blood Moon and an impromptu rain shower that perfectly washed out all the misery that was destined to be suffered later on in the circle.

Our esteemed GM Fresh Meat decided to take a tumble early on and supposedly rolled his ankle. We are still not a hundred percent sure if that injury was actually legitimate or if he was just terrified of the impending and honestly undetectable rain shower. Either way, at the mere call of his wife he miraculously jumped up and ran faster than cum smoke to the all-you-can-eat buffet line.

Speaking of divine intervention; our previously injured, claret-spilling, knee-splitting Baah Sinister decided to rock up on crutches with a heavily bandaged knee. None of us really bought the tragic act, except for the perpetually gullible Pepe Le Spew (also affectionately known as La Caca). The whole charade was unveiled when the offer of a free beer created a near Jesus-like miracle, prompting Baah Sinister to instantly jump up and run around without a single care in the world.

Without any real challenge out there and a somewhat subdued Cum Soc, Pepe easily found his way back to his golden day front-running antics.

Back at the circle Eno put on the most fantastic cookout. We were spoiled with two choices of onions, fresh white bread and super budget Coles snags. This gourmet feast was followed by fresh cream (or was it filling from last night’s Bukkake – seeing Cum Soc had 2 helpings we have to assume the later and jam doughnuts.

Ballbags went on a total hunger strike as he was simply not prepared to partake in the glorious culinary spread on offer. His stubbornness, coupled with a few late pull-outs – something Tristan’s wife has previously suffered from – and equally late sign-ups and later pull-outs from Aussie and Mustang, thankfully left more grub for the rest of us.

Our Sergeant clearly had washing day and rocked up in some tragic Temu version of a military outfit. He actually looked like Leon from the Hitman movie; it is just a pity he couldn’t hit the mark with his usual vindictive charges.

In the end, this run and walk was scored at a very well-respected point 69. But the most important thing to remember is that 69s were enjoyed by all there.